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18 Insights I've Learned From Those Older Than Myself

Updated: Jul 3

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Introduction


As a lifelong learner, I'm constantly learning and navigating the currents of life. Fortunately, I've had the wisdom of those who have come before me to guide my journey to improve the insights on this blog, for a better Philosocom. Here are some invaluable lessons I've learned from them:


Elaborated Lessons from the Elders:


  1. Seize the Advantage: Don't let beneficial opportunities slip through your fingers. When life throws open a door that aligns with your goals or could lead to positive experiences, step through it with confidence, for life is like a game of Risk. Remember, even if the path isn't perfectly clear, sometimes the best way to learn is by taking a chance. And even if that chance will be dark and grim, use the darkness to build your mind.



2. Study the Art of Communication:  Text messages and online interactions are convenient, but they lack the richness and benefit of face-to-face communication. Tone of voice, facial expressions, and body language all play a crucial role in understanding the true meaning behind someone's words. To bridge this gap, practice active listening – pay attention to the speaker's nonverbal cues during conversations, and when in doubt, ask clarifying questions. Even the autistic can read the room with enough practice.




3. Practice the Art of Gratitude: Never take kindness for granted, in a world filled by moral depravity, darkness and grief. Express appreciation to those who go the extra mile for you, especially the people who raised you and provided for your needs. A simple "thank you" or a gesture of your appreciation can go a long way in strengthening these bonds. With such simple gestures, we could socially engineer a better world.


4. The Essence of Loyalty and Cooperation: Collaboration is key in most aspects of life, where doing things by yourself are very hard or impossible. Strive for a clear division of labor within a group, and put and respect boundaries.


Don't be afraid to voice your opinions, but also be respectful of others' viewpoints. Ensure everyone understands their role and responsibilities to achieve a successful outcome.


And to think that "division of labor" exist only in the corporate world can be seen as a quasi-specific terminology. In other words, you can apply this seperation of tasks in your household, when going to a cafe (or working in it remotely), and even when driving someone.


5. Choose Your Words Wisely: While a curse word might feel to us as stress-and-pain relieving, it can often have negative consequences on your relationships with your friends, followers and even fans. Harsh language can damage relationships, create a hostile environment where coercion is normalized. Finally, it can even hinder your professional success, in the absence of a calmer mind. Express frustration in a more constructive way, and focus on solutions rather than insults.


6. Respect: The Cornerstone of A Greater Authority-Trust:  Always treat your elders and people in authority figures with respect. Disagreements happen, but yelling or disrespectful behavior achieves nothing but lost respect and potential, unintended results. Clearly and calmly state your case instead, in order to reduce stress, and not to aimlessly increase it.


And as an authority figure, consider adapting moral responsibilities for those who follow you. Do so, and you could better prevent insurgencies. This world has known enough internal wars...


7. Forge Your Own Path: Don't blindly follow societal norms! They often lack the understanding of what's good for you, and with their oppression, would even seek to stagnate you. While tradition and societal expectations can be valuable, and can contribute to social harmony, don't be afraid to chart your own course. That is, especially, when others don't even seek to understand, but to argue.



Carefully consider what truly aligns with your goals and values, and don't be afraid to break convention if necessary. Value the practicality of looking both ways.


8. Embrace Joy Without Guilt: Life can be enjoyed without guilt. Don't feel bad for indulging in activities that bring you genuine happiness as long as they're not harmful. Make time for relaxation and nurturing a peaceful life... it's essential for maintaining a healthy balance in life, as valued in Taoist philosophy.


9. Be Prepared! Always have some emergency cash on hand. Unexpected situations arise, and having some readily available funds can save the day, whether it's a flat tire, a missed bus fare, or a sudden need for a quick meal. However, don't restrict yourself to money alone. Think like a competent villain would.


And as such, as war emerged where I live, I remained calm. As I studied John Duran's very difficult life, I remained calm. As I gave people reason to avoid suicide, I remained calm. It is through preperations for the uncommon, that we grow our unique potential...


"It takes the Uncommon to create the Unique. Don't expect a Picasso from the ordinary, nor the common from a God" -- John Duran

10. Study The Art of Assertiveness: There's a difference between being a pushover and being aggressive. It doesn't have to be a dichotomy. Develop your assertiveness skills – learn to communicate your needs and boundaries clearly and confidently, while still being respectful of others. This hopefully will especially work for empaths.


11. Balancing Family and Independence: As you mature, your relationship with your family naturally evolves. While respect and gratitude remain crucial, you'll also establish your own independence. Find a healthy balance – make your own decisions, but remember the values and support your family has provided. Not only financially. Spend time with your old father and mother. Make them happy. Make them proud. Make them live longer.


12. Planning for Parenthood: Having children is a life-altering experience. Carefully consider your circumstances before starting a family. Ensure you're emotionally and financially prepared to provide a nurturing and stable environment for your children. Do not traumatize them, "so naturally..."


13. The Journey to Independence: Developing independence is an essential part of growing up. Learn to take care of yourself, manage your finances, and make your own decisions. Do not depend so unnecessarily. It shall hinder your growth and freedom.


14. Respectful Disagreement: Disagreements are inevitable. Learn to disagree with others respectfully: Agree to disagree.


"Agreeing to disagree is a rational way of saying out loud that there is no point in arguing further about an issue, as both parties have good reasons for believing what they do and are unlikely to change their minds.
Rather than simply disengaging from advocacy, it is better to propose  that you would prefer to agree to disagree." -- (Admiredleadership Blog)

Focus on understanding the other person's perspective and present your own arguments calmly and rationally. You can maintain good relationships even when you don't see eye to eye. As you should, and can.


15. Planning at Your Own Pace: Planning is vital for success, but don't get a paralysis by analysis. Some people thrive with detailed schedules, while others prefer a more flexible approach.  Craft a planning system that works for you. This way you can stay organized without feeling overwhelmed. Don't fall to a "reaping fatigue", like i did.




16. Consider the Ripple Effect:  Don't make rash decisions with significant consequences. Don't act on impulse. Don't "shoot yourself in the foot". Which leads to number 17...


17. Think about the potential domino effect of your choices, not just for yourself, but also for those who might be impacted by your actions. Take time to weigh the potential outcomes and choose a path that leads to a positive ripple effect.


18. Become a Discerning Thinker: Not all information is created equal, for it is compromised by ulterior motive, and by bias. Develop critical thinking skills – learn to evaluate the source of information, identify potential biases, and seek out diverse perspectives before accepting something as true.


Final Words


I hope I successfully imparted to you the lessons I received from those older than myself, and thanks for reading. Feel free to share if you'd like your connections to read it too.

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Tomasio A. Rubinshtein, Philosocom's Founder & Writer

I am a philosopher from Israel, author of several books in 2 languages, and Quora's Top Writer of the year 2018. I'm also a semi-hermit who has decided to dedicate his life to writing and sharing my articles across the globe. Several podcasts on me, as well as a radio interview, have been made since my career as a writer. More information about me can be found here.

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