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Insights From Living Alone

Updated: Feb 22

A beautiful bed room.

Ever since I watched a certain game called Silent Hill 4, where the protagonist was stuck in his own apartment, I've fantasized about living alone as well. My own concrete hermitage, where I would be able to live in and work for the rest of my life. I find it relieving to be a hermit because I'm not an overly social being. If anything, I am a-social and not fond of a lot of social interactions.

On July 2020, that dream came true. After years of having only a single room of true privacy, I now have 2 rooms and a bathroom. To be sincere, even though I love my mother, living alone had made me a happier, calmer person.

Why do some of you think that marriage is difficult? Although I've never been married, my mom used to be. In order for a marriage or relationship to succeed, feeling love towards the other person isn't enough.

You also need to know him or her and make sure you're not "stepping" on their weak points by mistake. It's something that might cause arguing from time to time. Unfortunately, it's rational to believe that, as long as you live with other people, arguing with each other and/or having "crises" are, most often than not, inevitable.

I suppose some of you, if not all of you, have at least similar thoughts on the matter. Finding someone with whom you won't have any disputes sounds a bit idealistic, to be sincere.

This raises the question -- why live together when you can have your own territory, even if it's rented and not bought? You no longer need to be married in order to live a satisfying, happy life. Marriage isn't necessarily an idealist delusion, but it isn't a walk in the park either. By living alone, you basically "cut the middle man", and have a greater deal of freedom and independence.

If you want someone dear to you to be with you, they don't have to live with you. You just invite them over. Why have roommates, let alone partners, when you can have visitors, who are people you approve of, whose presence is temporary? Be a good host and you'll be less lonely.

Once they're gone, you don't have to deal with the "darker" stuff, so to speak, that involves living with other people. You become your own man or woman, with only one "enemy" at your doorstep: Loneliness.

It can be the difficult thing about living alone. From a philosophical point of view, at least. Marriage, after all, is about ensuring that you won't find yourself alone. And that's the same with having children and raising them.

Unlike pets such as cats, babies require your full attention on a regular basis, and when they grow, you need to be with them if you want them to remember you as their parent. Hopefully even love you (something that, unfortunately, isn't always the case).

When you begin "assembling" a family... That's it, you will be alone only rarely. That's especially true if your partner shares a room with you. Some families may live in one or two rooms total! Because of that, those who are afraid of loneliness, AKA the negative part of solitude, go to the "easy route". They'll just fill their time with other people, within their own homes, as a possible means of escape. I wager some men go to bars enjoy some refreshing company?

As of late, I have discovered the effective world of VR. AKA, virtual reality. Or any other "game" that is basically an online chat room. It's otherwise known as a virtual world (and it does not alwyas require VR equipment). Are you feeling lonely? Just find a virtual room where you can gather up the courage to speak with other people. It's there, you're not alone anymore, even if you do live alone!

There are so many public "worlds" out there. Worlds where all computer-users can just log in to and stay, no further escapism required. No dating is required either, if you wish to preserve your apartment's solitude. Technology helps us escape from the emptiness and meaninglessness that's potential in our lives.

The question stands firmly: Why live with others, when you can be alone, and be with others altogether? Whether that is physically or virtually, the conventional method of marriage is no longer necessary as a form to fill up one's possible "feelings" of loneliness. On religious grounds, that might as well depend on your preference regardless, correct? Living alone is not a right. It's a privilege you can utilize to become a happier, calmer being.

And on the other hand, having friends is also a privilage.... None is ensured to you, and no one owes you much in a world that prioritizes personal liberties over cooperation.

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Tomasio A. Rubinshtein, Philosocom's Founder & Writer

I am a philosopher from Israel, author of several books in 2 languages, and Quora's Top Writer of the year 2018. I'm also a semi-hermit who has decided to dedicate his life to writing and sharing my articles across the globe. Several podcasts on me, as well as a radio interview, have been made since my career as a writer. More information about me can be found here.

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