Porky (also known as Pokey) is a character that, through the years, not only have I studied, but also found a lot of similarities with as my own life went by. I'm not talking about Loony Tunes, I'm talking about a relatively-obscure series called Earthbound.
Porky was a solitary kid who had only one friend, called Ness. Although cocky and a bit of a jerk, Porky was at a start a well-intentioned kid, who just wanted Ness to be his friend. No one liked him. Not his brother, not his abusive parents. Anyways, Porky really wanted to impress Ness so Ness would like him. This led him join a cult and become its leader's right hand.
When Ness encountered the cult, Porky asked him to be his friend, but all Ness did, was nothing. They both stood there, awkwardly, until Porky ran away, and with time, fell into moral corruption and thirst for power and authority.
Quite a strange turn of events, we must admit.
I guess Porky tried to raise high up in society's social ranks, so Ness and his friends would be impressed. All, just to be liked and approved, where no one in his life did. However, they rejected him and perhaps viewed him as an enemy. Which made sense, because eventually, Porky began serving the forces of evil, as he feel deep and deeper into their corruption, and eventually, into hatred.
Countless centuries (?) later, Porky managed to travel in time and became immortal. He amassed a brainwashed army and conquered a set of remote islands in the distant future. He made that distant region and its residents into his little playthings, resisted only by a small team. The rest were loyal to him because they were partially brainwashed as well. But they were also were given jobs, introduced to money and capitalism, and could able to afford materialistic lives thanks to Porky.
In other words, he created an "utopia", all in the name of being adored. Adored like he never was as a child. Because as a child he was a nobody. A nobody no one liked nor wanted to be in his presence. That includes his own family.
Never truly loved by anyone, he sought respect instead. Respect, power and prestige. I'm not sure if he even knew any true affection from other human beings.
He built a certain city in the skies. And a giant skyscraper as his base of operations. He went by names such as "King P" and "Master Porky".
Driven to insanity, he eventually decided to destroy the world. Because should the world disappear, then, everyone who doesn't like him, will also be gone. He seemed to detest any form of dislike of him. Perhaps it triggered, within him, his original life. Returned him to a place in his life he destroyed for good.
Nonetheless, he still remembered the boy he saw as his only "friend"; the "friend", who rejected him at all times. Porky never bothered to contact Ness, despite having the ability to travel time, using technology.
As my own life went by, I realized how similar I am to this villain, who might not necessarily be evil in the traditional sense. I too had a friend, someone some of you may already know -- the cursed Ms. Chen. Like Porky, I really wanted her to be my friend, and even though I was a bit odd socially, I still tried to please and impress her, so she would continue being my friend.
It was indeed a social mistake to say that I loved her. I didn't mind being rejected, as long as she would be my friend. However, she was intimidated by my sincerity, so she abandoned me like Ness abandoned Porky... On a Valentine's.
We rarely talked since 2013, because she tried to pretend that I don't exist.
As years went by, I didn't exactly became a dictator, and I didn't exactly amassed an army of brainwashed followers. Nor I want to do so, of course. However, like Porky, I became widely known across the world, even if not exactly famous. And I'm only growing.
Like him, I became a "big shot". With the power of the word, revenue and external help, many in the world began to know me, even if they -- you -- are not millions. I only intend to grow, indefinately.
Because like him, I remain unloved. Like him, I seek respect and relevance as alternatives. Why? Because it's better than nothing! It's better than pure hermitage! Because I can be a pure hermit, but I choose not to, because I believe in myself. Even without love, there is respect. And they don't go hand in hand, necessarily.
In 2021, I contacted my former friend. For some reason, she still kept my number. I was quite surprised, because I thought she never wanted to hear from me again. I was filled with joy...
...So filled with joy, that eventually I once again told her that I love her. Unable to understand love from a friendship perspective, she.. once again, abandoned me, finally, while also calling me "irrelevant", and telling me to "erase her from my life".
Like Porky, I became a lonely ruler. Ruler of a site that some might respect, but a lonely ruler nonetheless.
Now, I know what I must do. Become as relevant as I can, so anyone who would deem me irrelevant, will be gone from my life. Do you see, now, the similarities?
Sometimes, it is the good guy who makes a bad guy. Heroism could lead to villainy, and not always the other way around, necessarly. Anyways, while I'm not omnicidal like Porky, I do seek a form of "purity" in my own way -- pure relevancy, so anyone who would reject me will be gone from my life.
And... yes. I expect no disrespect from anyone I contact with. Disrespect... is too traumatic for me. Similar to how Porky experienced it.
Porky was traumatized by his only "friend", and in a way, so did I by my Chen. As he sought to purge unlove, I will seek to purge irrelevancy. I have become a rain, a pourer of articles. I became such, not to be loved, but contribute, to prove my worth... to anyone who cares.
And to provide.
In my eyes, Chen is dead, and I no longer care if she will appreciate my contribution anymore. I gave her a book I wrote once, but.. she still kept naming me a different name.
Now, what is left, is the whole world. If she never will see my worth, then you, the world, might, and that is really all I want in life, to help; be of worth. And I only, only live to work.
Maybe some of you consider me your friend, but for some reason.. I am an asocial man.
Watch this video, for a more detailed description of the character. If you got the time, of course.