I was born into a culture that partially follows the philosophy of "You must marry and have children", in accordance with the very book that birthed the Abrahamic religions -- Judaism, Christianity, Islam and more.
The part that follows said philosophy is the more religious people of my country; those who believe it is their duty to reproduce in order to populate the land after we returned to it from a long period of exile. However, I was fortunate enough not to be born in the part of society that looks down on those who do not wish to have children.
Despite the fact that I have many cousins, I am the only member of my generation in my family who is a male Rubinshtein.
Regardless of the respect I hold for my family and ancestors, who could've just given up on the notion of reproduction more easily than you might think... I currently wish to end my bloodline, because of the flaws in my genetics.
What people fail to realize about mental illness is the fact that some people who suffer from mental disorders, are condemned, by chance, to have those, simply by being born into a lineage of people who are themselves suffering from mental illness.
Thus, when you fall into that category, regardless of reason, you are, basically, cursed to play a game of chance with your future children, and their future children, and so on, on whether or not they will be ill as well, by your own genetic code.
Some of my own lineages are at least two generations old; they include people who had and have mental illness (had because some are no longer with us). I say "at least" because I don't know if the third generation before them was ill as well.
However, it matters not, for I am the third generation to carry this cursed illness, and some people on Quora shamed me when I asked sincere questions, simply because I too am ill.
What do I have to be ashamed of? Of being born? I don't think so. Another thing that people don't realize is that our current science cannot cure mental illnesses. It is why I take so many pills, even though all they do is delay the effects of my own illness.
Thus, if you call me ill in a degrading manner, you might not understand that all I did to have that illness -- general anxiety disorder and continuous fatigue -- was to be born to the "wrong" lineage.
If my father had kids with someone else, then I -- or someone else? -- might've lived without illness and without "medication" for mental disorders. It is only because of that decision that I largely isolate myself from the world, in an attempt to live more peacefully.
What would you do in my place? I think I am relatively attractive, purely because of my height and academic achievements and nothing more. I used to be pretty, but no longer.
Should I ever decide to bring a child into this world, I would automatically be bringing a human that is fated to live the rest of their lives ill and on delayed medication. That, you see, is why I refuse to have children.
It is also one of the reasons I'm an atheist, not purely because a God doesn't necessarily exist, but because I find it illogical that we are made in the divine image, along with the belief that divinity is purely good.
This philosophy is flawed, because some humans are far from divine imagery. One of my ancestors was a Rabbi who became secular after the holocaust killed his first family by their entirety.
It is because of his decision to move on that I am here, and why I feel in debt to him, along with my other ancestors, who made a new life in Argentina after they escaped from Europe during WWII.
I find it ironic that a divine being threatened the lives of my ancestors, through war, through genocide and persecution of a relatively harmless ethnic minority, just to eventually lead to my very own birth, along with those of my other family members.
Was all that bloodshed really that necessary, just for certain people to be born, in lieu of others? What kind of divinity is this, that drives the wheels of the world through slaughter, just to manipulate the possibility of birth?
It all returns to the question of, was the holocaust really necessary, just to give birth to a country that was already in plans of existing? It is, after all, the Jewish genocide of WWII, that made many of us Jews flee to Israel and "occupy Palestine".
Those who claim that Palestine needs to be liberated, don't understand how disbanding Israel would mean that another holocaust might happen, without our ability to properly defend ourselves from our racist enemies.
I wish to defy this divine madness, this flawed philosophy of bloodshed as a form of manipulating the births and deaths of people. I hope I would be able to do so, if and when I'd be able to... either clone myself or have a robotic child.
You see, that is the ONLY way I'd be able to gain my right for reproduction without playing the biological game of chance... by removing the element of mental illness in my genes. These are the only ways I'd be able to resume the Rubinshtein bloodline, even if it will be done in an artificial manner.
Cloning, you see, has already been achieved. As far as I know, you just need to take a sperm and inject it to an egg, without the need for intercourse. Do you think it is impossible? It is not. I've seen a video that revealed that there is a cloning facility in South Korea for pets, mainly dogs if I'm not mistaken.
A rich man's pet dog died, so he gave the scientists there the samples of his dog, and they created TWO dogs out of that dog's remain.
It seems that, in cloning, the element of spontaneous genes is gone, which means that a clone will not necessarily obtain the same genes of its predecessor. In other words, if your genes are flawed, or if you are an asexual, like me, and does not even want to reproduce, then cloning... could be the future of human continuation.
If a God exists in this universe, I feel obliged to admit that I think that their design is imperfect. With advance of technology, humans could, instead of praying to one God or another, BECOME divine, in a way, by... "Playing God".
Must we have a divine master, when we can be divine masters ourselves? Not necessarily now, and not necessarily in fiction and in video games, but in a way that would oppose natural design, and instead, design artificially, the very properties in which were considered to be in the hands of exclusive divinity?
I do not pretend at all to be a god myself, nor I aspire to achieve the orthodox traits of the Abrahamic God. All I wish for, you see, is for a potential line of generation, to exist, without having to carry my genes, organic or artificial.
I refuse to let a pair of "divine dice" to determine the name and future of my bloodline, just because of the imperfection of my genes...
You see, if I will get to resume my family name, I will only do so, if I get to "Play God", and instead of manipulating humanity through a series of events, I'd like to simply determine, without gamble, the default wellbeing of my children, and their children, and their children.
I want to do so, merely for their own good. I don't want to let chance to determine whether or not my future generations will be ill as I. It only goes to show, that if there is actual divinity, then that divinity could possibly be... outmatched.