On Arrogance -- Why I Don't Mean to Be Arrogant
Updated: Nov 16
(2023 Note: Now that I compared myself to other autists, I've realized I have Asperger's Syndrome, which can be considered part of ASD, or the Autism Spectrum Disorders. I, however, am no longer sure if I am indeed an autist, even though I was diagnosed. Please, take this article with a grain of salt, as I expect you to do, with any of my articles).
Arrogance is the product of those who desire to see themselves as superior to most, if not all, people. Since they are not honest enough to publicly admit this, they will attempt to cover up their lack of confidence through acts and expressions of either actual or delusional superiority. On the other hand, those who are modest have no desire to behave condescendingly, as they have nothing to hide in regards to their self-esteem.
Arrogance stems from an internal void one seeks to fulfill by compensating. That internal void is most often than not insecurity. For 2 years, I felt a great need to prove my relevance after my confidence has been compromised. However, I attained it, so I no longer have that void within me.
It is a common argument amongst my haters and negative critics that I'm arrogant, but the truth is that I do not intend to be arrogant or behave in a condescending manner. I am just being natural with my asperger's. I have no desire, nor do I believe, to be superior to others, even if I appear to be as such due to the misunderstanding of my condition. In fact, to this day I do not actually know what made me appear arrogant over the years, but you can rest assured that I see no reason to belittle anyone, or show how "great" I am, allegedly.
The world treats me in an antagonistic matter, so I became anti-villainous and killed off much of my emotions. I did it to survive in a world that does not care if I die, for I was irrelevant to it. Slowly but gradually, I prove it wrong.
If you meet me in real life or get to know me personally, you will find a good-hearted man who is of few words, for I do not like to speak vocally. If you wonder why I communicate abnormally, like a monotonous robot, I do not do it on purpose. I communicate that way in general, but mostly while writing, as writing is easier for me than speaking when it comes to forms of expression.
I do not intend to sound pretentious at all. This is the way I talk and behave, and I do it without any belittling motive whatsoever. I see no functional reason to belittle anyone, and am not responsible for your own insecurities, if you happen to be intimidated by my presence.
You should remember that ultimately, autism/Asperger's is not only a social disorder, but also a verbal/communicative one, making communication more complex and difficult than it is for the average individual, even though the wrong impression may be present to the naked eye.
Arrogance and Autism
I can understand the disgust people have towards arrogance. It insults the ego of the one who is being belittled, and since we do not like to be belittled, we naturally retaliate against the entity we view as condescending. It's a natural response to what appears as a threat, even if it's merely psychological and/or social. We don't like to be inferior to others, whether or not we actually are in whatever measurement.
It is funny that we retaliate even though no threat was actually made on us. Those who retaliate irrationally usually do it because they lack the confidence to not do just that.
Since people treated me like dirt due to their own lack of understanding, that I am not an arrogant man, I slowly but surely began seeing this world as hostile. Even empaths may treat me with hostility due to my honest behavior. So, with time, I developed ruthlessness, to combat back those who don't know what they're talking about. Combat back, so I can do what I want to do in life: Working on Philosocom for you. I have no desire to waste much time and energy on those who treat me according to their own Platonic impressions.
Arrogance in others makes us think that something is amiss -- something that the arrogant person has and we don't. It frustrates us, especially if we see that person as pretentious. Pretentiousness in general is frustrating because it always comes with delusion. The pretentious person does not know they are one, so they continue believing they are the person they actually aren't. It is frustrating because it appears obvious to us, but not to them.
Ironically, arrogance can lead to another arrogance, just as fire and fire create only a bigger one. The ego of the listener is hurt, as they are given the impression that they are inferior (whether or not they agree with this view).
As a result, the retaliation could lead to not only complaining about the arrogant person, but also giving the retaliating person a need to put the arrogant person "in their place". Who puts people in their place, if not in a superior manner?
For example, a teacher to a student, a parent to their child, a boss to their employee, and so on.
This creates a state of "hypocrisy," where there are two arrogant people (or one, if the first person didn't mean to be arrogant). Perhaps the most condescending response I've ever received as a result of my behavior was "Go home and be quiet."
This is ironic because a stranger on the internet does not have the official authority to tell me what to do in the confines of my home. Perhaps the insulted person feels it is "legitimate" to be arrogant back, as they've received evidence from the external world that the other was, indeed, arrogant. It is as if they are serving the same dish that they have been served themselves.
Why be arrogant to those whom you've experienced arrogance? Why be arrogant just because you felt someone else to be condescending, whether or not they actually were? Why stoop to a level that wasn't necessarily there?
That is the problem of judging reality from the point of mere impression: They are not good-enough sources of information.
So, to hell with impressions of reality. Question the validity of these impressions instead, in order to avoid unnecessary misunderstandings.
Once one is confident enough in the value of their actions, there is little need to brag about their accomplishments, as those accomplishments will speak for themselves. For example, I can say that I have written seven books, but I do not bring this up often because it is unnecessary.