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The Positive Side of Dysfunctional Behavior -- Why Opposition Is Often A Necessity For Few -- A Dream Case Study

Updated: Mar 20

A mansion with guards and a vehicle.


In this article, I would like to share some food for thought I have obtained thanks to a dream I had.


The Price of Harmony

Have you ever found yourself being scolded for doing something, not even maliciously, by the External World? Have you ever been told there are things you shouldn't do because they, technically, disrupt the harmony of a place or a situation?


In the mentioned dream, I was a kid that was sent, from time to time, to a luxurious social club for kids. The club itself was, in fact, a mansion in a large grassland area, with a view of the ocean. The mansion itself was large as well, and the environment that surrounded it was silent and peaceful.



This peaceful setting, however, wasn't as promising as it appeared.


One day, during a meeting with the other kids, one of them called me "stupid" in front of everyone. This triggered a surge of anger within me. My autistic mind, was too explosive and sensitive back then, to accept that reality. I reacted poorly, yelling and becoming visibly agitated and distressed.


Instead of acknowledging the provocation, and understand the root behind my reaction, the club's authority placed the blame on me. They claimed my reaction, an anxious response to being belittled, was disruptive and made everyone uncomfortable. They didn't acknowledged the fact that it all stemmed from me being uncomfortable in the first place, and that I couldn't hold this discomfort within me. They fail to understand how I process the world around me, nor they cared that it is something to be studied and recognized, not be left in darkness.



What point is there in spending time and resources on people who have no desire nurture a framework based on the greater understanding of all people involved? Frustrated and unwilling to conform to their non-inclusive views of "harmony," I quit the club without a second thought, knowing I had better things to do with my time.


As I left, an unsettling discovery awaited me. This seemingly peaceful haven harbored a dark secret – a private army with tanks and soldiers clad in pink and black uniforms were stationary across the premises. This image served as a contrast to the club's outward facade of tranquility.


Perhaps that place is tranquill for most people, but I experienced it as differently. As grim, and as a place where my pecuilar way of seeing the world is unwelcomed. Since my mentality is here to stay, there's no point for institutions to contain me, whether or not they understand it themselves.


For I by default experience the world for its unwillingness to understand different minds, nor understand how they work. The belief that it understands only promotes loneliness, embedded in social interactions that have no interest in seeing who you are, preferring a masked version of yourself instead.


My mother in the dream, while disappointed in my sudden exit, ultimately understood. She understood there as she's capable of understanding in real life through my DNA. What ruins intuition is complete reliance on it, hence why intuition alone is not enough. We must see the children for who they are, or we'll risk making them lonely than they already are.


The dream seems to suggest that the membership fee, both financial and emotional, was simply too high a price to pay for a place that prioritized harmony caused by forced calmness over genuine understanding. That's why there are different qualities of social harmony preservation, some better than others.



Rebellion and its Lessons


The dream of the exclusive children's club with its dark secret revealed a lot about navigating social expectations and staying true to yourself. Here's what my subconscious revealed:


1. Dysfunction Can Be a Defense Mechanism:


The initial rage I felt at being called "stupid" was a natural response to an insult, but only natural to unique people like me. While my outburst may not have been ideal, it was my way of protecting myself from the emotional assault I experienced, before I died inside. In some situations, pushing back against a system that seeks to suppress your authentic self can be a form of self-preservation.



2. Unanswered Questions Can Be Warning Signs:


The private army was a blatant red flag. The dissonance between the club's peaceful facade and its hidden military force hinted at a deeper darkness, covered by the delusion of the first impression bias. Choosing to walk away, even without a full understanding of the situation, allowed me to avoid potential harm or submission to an opposing force.


3. Trust Your Judgment, Even When It's Unconventional:


The club prioritized a curated "harmony" over individual expression. While their rules may have seemed logical to them, logic is to be expanded using the study of other minds, who naturally see the world a differentway. It's crucial to weigh societal expectations against your own values and act accordingly, with or without the validation of those who refuse to question their methods. Your actions don't always have to be approved, especially by those who merely think they understand properly.


4. Respect for Individuality is Crucial:


My "poor behavior," as some might perceive it, stemmed from my unique perspective. The dream highlighted the importance of tolerance for diverse ways of thinking and reacting, even if they differ from the norm. What makes the norm anti-humanist in nature lies in its refusal to question its own morality and logic, thus closing itself from study that could improve it for greater inclusion of diverse people.


5. Asserting Your Rights is Essential:


While the dream world didn't show acceptance from the club, it underscored the fundamental human rights of protest, expression, and living by your own moral code. Even if these rights aren't always granted, they remain invaluable and should be fiercely defended.


We shouldn't succumb to the victim's mentality. Doing so would just enable the very same systems we are oppose to for opposing us. Instead, we should work to change them, either from outside or from within, or retire from them in the name of our mental survival.



Conclusion


The dream of the exclusive children's club can remind us that sometimes, the most valuable lessons come from rejecting conformity, and not using its benefits by being a part of it. It's okay to question the status quo, prioritize your well-being, and assert your right to be yourself, even if it unsettles others.


While striving for harmony is important, it shouldn't come at the cost of sacrificing your authenticity or ignoring potential dangers. Use your best judgment to navigate the complexities of the world around you. But do not settle with that skills current proportions, or you might be no better than the non-studious norms. Develop your critical thinking skills, so relying on those who refuse to understand you, would decrease.

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2 Comments


Gladia
Gladia
Jul 24, 2023

I agree with your view entirely. By chance, does philosocom give lectures in the autumn?

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Thanks for reading.


Philosocom is purely a philosophy blog. Since I cannot speak and breathe at the same time, I don't often carry out lectures. If I do, I only do so through speeches, which you can find here, as well.

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Tomasio A. Rubinshtein, Philosocom's Founder & Writer

I am a philosopher from Israel, author of several books in 2 languages, and Quora's Top Writer of the year 2018. I'm also a semi-hermit who has decided to dedicate his life to writing and sharing my articles across the globe. Several podcasts on me, as well as a radio interview, have been made since my career as a writer. More information about me can be found here.

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