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Atoning For The (Few) Mistakes of My Life

Updated: Mar 12

Mistakes are arguably life's greatest adversary. They are those that, if you are aware of their gravity, will make you regret them the most in life, probably more than anything else you will face. Thus, what you should learn from this article, even though I just began writing it, is to make sure that you make the fewest number of mistakes possible.

Any decision you're about to make -- you should think of whether or not you're going to regret it at any point in the future, after a week, a month, a year, or even half a decade or a century. Mistakes should be kept to a bare minimum, if possible. After all, once you make them, there might be no going back.

Even as a first-grader, I was aware of this insight, but I continued to make mistakes. The education my family gave me was so superb, I am, to this day, afraid of making any mistakes.

Thanks to them, I have made very few mistakes in my life, with the majority of them occurring in my childhood. To show you that I am not afraid of honesty, and to atone for the few sins I have committed, I will now list them in an orderly fashion.

1. Inspired by video games, I have participated in physical fights against other people during my life. That is only natural for a boy in school to do so, with all the energy involved and the fantasies implemented by the various media given to males.

Of course, not all boys will be violent, but because I was yet to learn the consequences, I can say that I was a bit violent as a kid. I even had my own gang, and we participated in fights and spied on each other.

That period, where I oversaw my own small gang, lasted only a few years, and after a couple of punishments from the teachers, I eventually stopped being violent. I was merely violent for the sake of playing.

We had a game back then called "cops and robbers", that was where I was the most violent in my life, as that required actively taking people into a certain place in order to win. Looking back, that game was stupid and un-educational.

2. I picked on a girl. That was also in elementary. She loved me, in a kid's way, but I didn't love her back because she wasn't very pretty-looking at all. I also regret being bullied by her and by kids in general. If you are under the impression that I was a little brat, I was to a degree, but I strived to be a good student grade-wise and was so as well. That's the sin I regret the most, and I hope she wasn't as influenced by my stupidity back then.

3. Also during that time, one of the ways I learned English independently was by being an internet troll. Eventually, I joined a trolling community against Justin Bieber. I was even quite top-ranking in that organization.

After a traitor exposed our identities, I decided to abandon the group entirely. This is the sin I regret the least, because I believe little harm was actually done to anyone, let alone Bieber himself. Since then, I haven't listened to any of his songs, and I have no intention of doing so today. Since then, I have left my trollish ways, and haven't trolled anyone.

4. Returning to adulthood, I tried my luck at pay-to-win games. These games are basically video games that are usually free but require a ridiculous amount of spending if you want to be good at them. I thought to myself that if I spent just about enough, I shouldn't have any problems being good.

However, as I learned, these games were dominated by the rich and/or the addicted. Even though I spend a ton of money on these games, one game at a time, I am easily beaten by those who spend far more than me.

These games are so stupid in essence, but they are effective financially, as they attract people who are either rich and want to show their power or addicted people who are gratified by these financially demanding games. I have a game like that on my console, but I have learned my lesson and I intend to spend as little on it as possible (which I already do).

5. Finally, I regret ever falling in love with my "nemesis", Ms. Chen, even though there was no harm done to anyone back then, perhaps only to myself. I guess that in the end, she was a very, very trashy person, as one reader put it to me.

6. I cheated in an internet game to avoid interaction. However, the cheating wasn't as severe as one might think. That game has very strict rules for some reason, and only a few would actually find it fun. All I did was make several accounts when told to make one. That there's all to it.

I am sure that no one who was involved in my sins is reading my articles or following me anywhere online, but I will apologize to them anyway by publishing this article. I was juvenile, I was dumb, and I will not do any of these things again. Including number 5. Love appears to bring much suffering, both to me and others. It is best that I won't be engaged romantically ever again.

I hope those whom I have wronged, even if few, will forgive me, or already have. I guess that most don't care at all anymore and carried on with their lives long ago. Nonetheless, if I am to die eventually, I want to do so with the fewest number of regrets, if any.

Now I ask you: do you have the courage to atone publicly, just as I did just now? As long as your philosophy gives you the courage to stand up for yourself and make an honest attempt to apologize, you might eventually die like I intend, with little to no regrets in life.

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Tomasio A. Rubinshtein, Philosocom's Founder & Writer

I am a philosopher from Israel, author of several books in 2 languages, and Quora's Top Writer of the year 2018. I'm also a semi-hermit who has decided to dedicate his life to writing and sharing my articles across the globe. Several podcasts on me, as well as a radio interview, have been made since my career as a writer. More information about me can be found here.

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